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[T3] Definition of Fnord

This is from Discordian / illuminati Encyclopedia


Fnord is evaporated herbal tea without the herbs.

Fnord is that funny feeling you get when you reach for
  Snickers bar and come back holding a slurpee.

Fnord is the 43 1/3rd state, next to Wyoming.
Fnord is this really, really tall mountain.
Fnord is the reason boxes of condoms carry twelve
instead of ten.

    Fnord is the blue stripes in the road that never
get painted.
    Fnord is place where those socks vanish off to in
the laundry.
    Fnord is an arcade game like Pacman without the
little dots.
    Fnord is a little pufflike cloud you see at 5pm.

           Fnord is the tool the dentist uses on
unruly patients.
    Fnord is the blank paper that cassette labels are
printed on.
                          Fnord is where the buses
hide at night.
                 Fnord is the empty pages at the end
of the book.

    Fnord is the screw that falls from the car for no
      Fnord is why Burger King uses paper instead of
        Fnord is the little green pebble in your shoe.
          Fnord is the orange print in the yellow

Fnord is a pickle without the bumps.             Fnord
is why ducks eat trees.
Fnord is toast without bread.     Fnord is a venetian
blind without the slats.

Fnord is the lint in the navel of the mites that eat
        the lint in the navel of the mites that eat
        the lint in Fnord's navel.

Fnord is an apostrophe on drugs.
Fnord is the bucket where they keep the unused serifs
for H*lvetica.
Fnord is the gunk that sticks to the inside of your
car's fenders.
Fnord is the source of all the zero bits in your

                      Fnord is the echo of silence.
                    Fnord is the parsley on the plate
of life.
                  Fnord is the sales tax on happiness.
                Fnord is the preposition at the end of

Fnord is the feeling in your brain when you hold your
breath too long.
Fnord is the reason latent homosexuals stay latent.

                Fnord is the donut hole.
                  Fnord is the whole donut.

  Fnord is an annoying series of email messages.
  Fnord is the color only blind people can see.

Fnord is the serial number on a box of

                           Fnord is the Universe with
decreasing entropy.
                          Fnord is a naked woman with
herpes simplex 428.
                                           Fnord is
the yin without yang.
                        Fnord is a pyrotumescent
retrograde onyx obelisk.

Fnord is why lisp has so many parentheses.
Fnord is the the four-leaf clover with a missing leaf.

                          Fnord is double-jointed and
has a cubic spline.
Fnord never sleeps.
                                      Fnord is the
"een" in baleen whale.

Fnord is neither a particle nor a wave.

                 Fnord is the space in between the
pixels on your screen.

  Fnord is the guy that writes the Infiniti ads.
 Fnord is the nut in peanut butter and jelly.
Fnord is an antebellum flagellum fella.

                Fnord is a sentient vacuum cleaner.

Fnord is the smallest number greater than zero.
Fnord lives in the empty space above a decimal point.

Fnord is the odd-colored scale on a dragon's back.
Fnord is the redundant coin slot on arcade games.
Fnord was last seen in Omaha, Nebraska.

     Fnord is the founding father of the phrase
"founding father".
       Fnord is the last bit of sand you can't get out
of your shoe.
     Fnord is Jesus's speech advisor.
       Fnord keeps a spare eyebrow in his pocket.
     Fnord invented the green hubcap.
       Fnord is why doctors ask you to cough.

Fnord is the "ooo" in varooom of race cars.
Fnord uses two bathtubs at once.

I cannot escape them
No matter how I try
They wait for me everywhere
I cannot pass them by.

Driving down the street
I see "Jesus Is Lord"
And then immediately after
I hear the word "FNORD!"

Innocuous sayings and parables
And on the evening news
I hear the word "FNORD!"
And suddenly I'm confused

I sit alone in my room
And I'm feeling rather bored
I turn on the tube and guess what
I hear the word "FNORD!"

"Don't see the fnords and they won't eat you"
That's what I've heard the wisemen say
But I can't get away from those beasties
There's just no fucking way.

I believe I found these on alt.discordia


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